I was in the sky again, destination Tampa. The engine noise was in the background for some time. I tried to read a detective novel, which usually could grab my attention, but my thoughts were still lingering on the passionate sex with that faculty member in the school office. The memory of his eyes, his touch, and his kisses still made me shiver. It was also good to go back to see the school, have some reflection, and see some old friends. During the trip an unexpected outcome was that the idea of living as a gay seemed to emerge— no more lies to myself that I would still be interested in getting married, no longer trying to convert back to living as a straight person, no more blind dates. Would it be difficult? I was certain. Was I prepared to face the consequences? I gradually believed that I could.
The flight attendants started picking up the food trays. My thoughts were redirected to the Paradise Lakes Resort where I was heading for. I had been to a few resorts but never to a clothing optional one. Thanks to the Internet, I found it when I planned for this trip. Although I did not associate nudity with sex, there was a tiny unspoken wish that I could have a vacation delight there even though it was a resort for everyone. I did so in most of my previous visits to a few resorts. There would be some men traveling alone. With a little hope, one could survive in any harsh time.
For years I had been always going to resorts whenever I could escape from work for a few days. When abroad, I felt adventurous to explore the possibilities to have some surprising encounters. I always chose those men alone. I did make some mistakes on those occasions though. The first one was with a roommate. We shared a same unit with our own bedrooms and common living room and bath. He was an Italian. We arrived on the same day. A few days passed. I hadn’t made any progress. Then in one afternoon, I saw him stepping out from the bathroom with a towel on his waist when I walked into our unit. I took a shower too. After the cold shower, I felt great as it was hot outside. I was in good shape and I felt sexy with only the towel on my waist. I saw him lying on his bed covered with that towel, nothing else. I walked toward his room and started chatting with him about our experiences in the past few days. He seemed to be in the mood to hold a conversation. An old trick, I brought up that I would need a massage and asked if he would like to have one as I could give him one. He took the bait.
I asked him to lie on his stomach. His towel still covered his middle section. I climbed up his bed and sat on him, with my towel on. As usual, I gave him a professional quality massage on his back, head, and legs. Then I asked him to turn around. His manhood appeared momentarily but soon was covered by that orange towel again. I started working on his face and his head while seating on his dick, not aroused. I could feel it, but I didn’t detect his discomfort. Nor did I feel embarrassed. Then I worked on his stomach and the area below the belly. As I did not see any sign of rejection, I threw his towel away.
“It will be easier this way,” I said. He didn’t show any sign of shyness.
I worked on the area surrounding his private part and I was careful not to cross the line. He seemed to be comfortable of this kind of closeness. I then worked on his thighs, reaching the edge of the balls. I used some amount of pressure to make it feel “professional.” In the meantime, I paid attention to see if there was any sign of arousal. Alas, I did not see any. I firmly pressed on two sides of his sides to the very end — the edge of the balls a few times. I might “accidentally” touch the balls twice or three times.
At the end of the massage, I had to give up pursuing further exploration. There seemed to be no room for me to do anything more. I wondered whether he really was totally straight or both of us were too shy to make any move. Luckily, I didn’t end up with any embarrassment.
* * *
Upon the plane touched down the Tampa International Airport, I had already built up my expectation through memories of those bold and erotic encounters. It was not difficult to find the taxi area.
“The Paradise Lakes, please.”
The driver didn’t say much but started driving.
On the way to the resort, there was not much to see. My mind was pre-occupied with the thoughts of the coming event. When I was younger, I read an article, in which the author described the changing mood of tourists on a boat heading for a nude Greek island. In those days, nudity equaled to sexiness to me, and somewhat suggested a possible encounter. Finally the taxi stopped at a gate.
“Here you are, the Paradise Lakes.”
I paid the fare and thanked him.
The place seemed quieter than I expected. Not a single person on sight. It was hot but not unbearable. Besides, I would be naked in a moment.
I walked in the main entrance. Three staff members were in the lobby to welcome me. They all wore clothing. The atmosphere was very pleasant. That erased my sense of uncertainty when arriving in a new place.
I was led to my room, a very large room with a full kitchen, much bigger than I expected. My room was on the ground floor and the king-sized bed was not too far from the floor-to-celling windows. So I could watch people passing by, or I could be watched. That didn’t bother me though. My mental barrier was not about nudity. As long as it was legal, I would be fine. Across from the bed was a huge mirror wall with a TV set in front. A dining table was in the center of the room and a kitchen was in the back.
I had just had lunch in the plane and I started the day early. So I took a shower then took a nap before heading out for the adventure. I was here to relax, no plan, no pressure. I was still lingering to the faculty member from my school. His smile, his gorgeous body, and his final exclamation were still so clear to me, just like yesterday. I was beginning to feel regretful that I did not exchange the contact information with him. What could I do even if I had had it? The memory was still sweet, though. I felt there was unspoken love between us. I didn’t know whether he thought the same. There was a saying: “It’s one night for a man, but it’s a life-time for a woman.” I could identify that kind of thinking from a woman’s perspective.
The bed was extremely comfortable. I slept for about an hour. When I woke up, it was already late in the afternoon. I headed out to explore the resort. The resort extended over a large area with a few lakes. I did not go far, staying close to the main amenities.
I liked where my room was located. It was far away from the pool and was situated in a quiet courtyard. I enjoyed staying in the quiet corner when I was not in the mood with the crowd.
When I was in the bar having a drink after the dinner, I chatted with a guy next to me. He arrived here a few days earlier than I did. We talked about the food in the restaurant was expensive. He told me that there was a supermarket nearby and he recommended me to take a look. Then there came the disco time. I did not stay there for too long. I even did not go dancing as most people here were couples. So I went back to my room to rest a little bit then went to the swimming pool.
There were a few swimming pools. The main one was lighted and it felt quite romantic. I soaked myself in the water, my head leaning on the edge of the pool as I looked onto the stars. When I was nine or ten, I always stood at the balcony to look at the stars. I was fascinated by the universe. I was also hoping to see the neighbour who was at his late 20’s or early 30’s. I liked to see him, but I never talked to him. I don’t know why I liked to see him at that time. I still remember his face. It is deeply imprinted in my mind as well as the night sky view of Taipei when I was a kid.
It was a busy season. Quite a lot of people in the resort, all were nude except the staff. I didn’t automatically associate nudity with sex. Nudity was so natural to me. We were part of the nature. People with various shapes and looks, very few kids though, we seemed to be all comfortable of the atmosphere. While I was enjoying myself in the cool water of the pool, my gaydar was still searching for signals. No one caught my attention, but I was not desperate. My body and thoughts were still with that faculty member.
The next morning I went to look around the small shopping area nearby. I was delighted for the choices I had for cooking. I bought some stuff for the coming four days. I enjoyed cooking, especially on an experimental mood for myself.
Days passed by with sort of routine. In the daytime, I went to explore different parts of the resort. In the evening hours, I soaked in the swimming pool looking at the stars. I became acquainted with a couple who didn’t live far but came to the Paradise Lakes for a few days every year. The wife was a house wife and part-time school bus driver, and the husband was a fire-fighter.
They shared a lot of their life experience with me, and we connected so well that we met every night in the swimming pool. I also could feel how hard working they had done together to build their family. I knew I wouldn’t have that kind of experience, but I could feel it and I valued it.
Visitors came and went in such a resort. Over the course of time, I bumped into a few people a few times, but usually just nodding to each other and passed over. One man got my attention because he was always fully protected when he roller-skated. He had covered his head, elbows, knees, ankles, but his dick was always unprotected. It was quite ironic.
It was the last full day that I would be here. Then I would fly back to Taipei. Since I had already explored most of the resort, I decided to go to the swimming pool. Shortly, there came a new face sitting near me in the water. He looked tanned without tan line. He had a good looking face with quite some facial hair and a very hairy body. I greeted his joining, and said:
“I haven’t seen you at all.”
“I just came here for a day.” He continued, “I live near-by.” Then he explained to me the resort’s day pass program.
The conversation carried on without efforts. We could talk various subjects, but we both were very into the naked resorts and beaches. He had explored many nude beaches in the United States. I asked him if he could write to me about those beaches and he agreed. We could talk easily but I could see that he was shy in general. As it was about lunch time, I invited him to join me for a lunch at my suite as I did have an extra proportion. He agreed upon without thinking much.
Once getting into my room, he said:
“It’s good to have the air-con. It’s getting hot after staying outside for a while.”
“Have you been staying over night here?”
“No, I always come for a day.” Then he changed the subject, “The room is really big.”
“Yes, I like it. I can also cook.”
Preparing lunch was easy. Soon we had our lunch on the table. After lunch, I offered him to watch TV as there was really no other entertainment here and it was simply too hot outside. As the TV set was directly in front of the bed, he had to sit on the bed. I closed the curtain. He started flipping through different channels as I washed the dishes. Then I joined him watching TV for a while, and prepared for a nap.
Looking at a naked man on the same bed with me, I couldn’t resist to think of exploring something more, but I had no clue whether he was gay. During the course of conversation, I could tell he was a little bit shy, but no sign of being a gay. The most difficult part was that he was next to me naked and no one else around. As he faced the other side, I could see his entire back. I wanted to touch him but my brain told me not to. Finally I broke the silence:
“Sorry, I feel horny now, and I have to masturbate.”
He didn’t say a word, but he didn’t leave the bed either. I knew he was not asleep. I started stroking myself, in the meantime, I hoped that he would turn around at one point. I started making some noise to show my gratification in the hope that it could excite him. It didn’t work out either. Things turned hotter, I felt I needed to touch him, so I moved my left arm to gently touched him. He did not withdraw. I then started touching his body, his butt. Chinese idiom “Give you an inch, then you want a foot” describes that situation. The odd thing was that he didn’t leave or showed any sign of disapproval. I thought of rubbing my manhood on his butt crack, but felt it might be too much. So the most I could do was to touch him while I masturbated.
The final moment arrived. I felt so relieved. I got up to clean up myself and he sat up on the bed too. When I returned to the room, he was still sitting on the bed. I joined him again, watching TV, and talked various things, but we didn’t talk about what had just happened as though nothing happened.
Weeks later back in Taipei, I received a letter addressed to me. I opened it. It was a list of the nude beaches in the United States. He simply stated,
“As promised, this is a list of…” signed with his first name. The envelope did not have a return address.
"Stranger in Paradise"
My “stranger in Paradise” looked like the character “Jean Valjean” in the Les Miserables
